Why So Blu?

Brian White’s Indisputable Heavyweight ‘Top 10 Films of 2013’

The calendar year of 2013 was a tough one for me in the film department.  However, unlike my recent Top 10 Blu-ray list over here, where I struggled to even find ten Blu-rays that I really really liked in 2013 (only leaving off Cloud Atlas), I find myself faced with a smorgasbord of films that I now must condense down to just ten mere selections.  And I think to myself, hey that’s not fair!  Yahoo published an article over a week ago with their 25 greatest films of 2013.  Why can’t I do that?  Well, it just wouldn’t be a true “Top 10” list then, would it?  So here we are, and depending upon where you’re geographically located there may or may not be snow on the ground, it’s that time of again.  It’s that time when for one day I get to play God and pummel you with my crude opinion and brute force as to what flicks I think deserve the most critical love, praise and acclaim this year.  And I’ll stop you there and get one thing off my massive man chest real quick.  I’m a mainstream critic.  Just like I don’t go for all those foreign film Criterion releases on Blu-ray, I also tend to shy away from anything made by Woody Allen or that would be playing at an art house theater rather than the massive Cinemark down the street from my house.  I realize this makes me a snob, but I thought it would be common courtesy to give you a heads up before you go asking hey what about Blue Jasmine, Before Midnight, Short Term 12 or even All Is Lost.  It’s not that they are bad movies, they just aren’t my cup of proverbial tea.  I respect that and I hope you do too.

And before I go on I thought I’d also mention the fact that despite my previous statement  that I just made, I did try to step outside my comfort zone this year and see some highly respected, but essentially controversial films such as Fruitvale Station (my Blu-ray review can be found here) and the heavy Oscar favorite 12 Years A Slave.  While Fruitvale is not really a movie I could ever see myself watching or even wanting to watch ever again for that matter, I did appreciate the simplicity of the storytelling and how effectively its execution (no pun intended) was carried out onscreen.  While 12 Years A Slave on the other hand, I don’t have enough patience nor do I want to waste anymore time than a minute explaining all the reasons in which I hated it since I can’t get that two hours of my life back again not to mention the sixteen dollars.  I have not been that let down in the theater this year since Hangover Part III, but even with that film I found ways to appreciate it for the weakling (or disaster) it is.  I’m even a huge fan of the Solomon Northup penned memoir of the same name, but I can’t tell you how disappointing the screen adaptation of the book was…at least for me.  It’s like the actors didn’t even show up until Michael Fassbender entered the picture.  However, that’s just my take on it and in no way represents what the rest of the industry thinks about the film.  And for that reason and countless other inaccuracies I found in this picture, I consider myself a minority (no pun intended again) in regards to this film within the movie review industry.  However, the reason for telling you all of this is to be as up front and honest with you all as possible that my choices below may be a bit unorthodox, mainstream for the most part and could even be considered juvenile as far as the number eight selection goes, but thank the gods there was not a Transformers movie this year.  And for anyone wondering where Inside Llewyn Davis is on my list below, I honestly think I’d be bored as f#$% watching that.  So why do it to myself?  It’s not like folk music and Coen Brothers’ erratic endings are my top passions in life.

So finally…here’s the part of my Top 10 piece where I usually spend a couple moments talking about the films that really disappointed me in 2013.  Come on!  Do I really need to do that?  Isn’t there enough animosity and negativity in this world?  This is supposed to be a positive exercise and I’m going to try my hardest to keep it that way.  I’m better than that Lords of Salem, Bullet to the Head, Texas Chainsaw 3D, Mama, The Purge, A Good Day to Diehard (which I refuse to watch past the 45-minute mark) and The Lone Ranger.  And this is also the time and place where I discuss all my honorable mentions of movies that I liked a lot, but just didn’t make my harsh cut below.  However, as I stated before this is a “Top 10” list and no one wants to hear about my affinity and praise for Star Trek Into Darkness, The Kings of Summer, Warm Bodies, Thor: The Dark World, The Wolverine and surprisingly Home Front too.

So without further ado, I would only like to mention that there is only one film I regret not being able to see this year.  No, it’s not Grudge Match.  I’m a product of my environment and constantly live under the shadow of the mistake my parents made by not providing me a life and childhood in California.  So for that reason alone I’m geographically challenged when it comes to events I cannot attend in the industry as well films that never make it to where I currently reside even though I’m supposedly living on the third coast in Austin, TX.  Whoever gave this city that moniker needs to be shot immediately.  The coast is four hours away.  Third coast my a$$!  Anyway, because of the impoverished environment I reside in the film Her never made it my way this year, but instead opted for a January 10th release date in this area.  And for that I live eternally in regret for missing out on it.  I feel very strongly that it could have found a home on my Top 10 list below from the trailer footage I have seen thus far, but I thought the same thing about 12 Years A Slave so what the hell do I know anyway?

Now that I got all that above off my deeply chiseled and defined pectoral muscles of nothing but my sexy man chest, I guess it’s time to spread the peanut butter and jelly on the bread and put it all together below as I introduce to you Brian White’s selections of his Top 10 Films of 2013.  Drum roll please…

10.  Don Jon

So first and foremost, this is a very simple and safe romantic comedy film, but it’s an entertaining and quite an effective one albeit that deals with a delicate, sensitive subject that could be a very tricky one to tackle…porn addiction.  Also I think it’s safe to assume that the topic of human-to-human relationships also comes up when combatting, examining and talking about porn addictions in more detail, right?  Absolutely!  And those dynamics are what make this flick tick and ultimately an absolute gem for me!  Tack on the fact that not only does the handsome and suave Joseph Gordon-Levitt star in this one, but it’s also his very first feature film that he has both written and directed.  How’s that for impressive?!  No doubt that this reincarnated Batman, Nightwing, whatever you want to call him star’s on the rise.  His star is skyrocketing and shooting way up there!  A key aspect of this film, at least for me, is also taking a look at the lead character’s family and getting a behind-the-scenes look at his upbringing.  It may not logically make sense as to why he’s addicted to porn, but it helps one to understand the guilt he carries each and every day he opens that lid on his Macbook (usually multiple times a day).  So essentially, this one is very much a character piece as we go along for the ride with Joseph’s character as he tackles his inner demons and beliefs of what he thinks out of life, however, sometimes the greatest gift we have in our lives is right there in front of us and we never really realize it until it’s usually too late.  It doesn’t make matters any worse that there’s plenty of NSFW and eye candy content to stare at and drool over too.  You see?  I’m doing my best to make it worth the time of gentlemen who could care less about a relationship drama by providing you many reasons why you still might want to stick this one out if your woman insists.  It’s also highly entertaining as well, so that helps too!  The scene where Tony Danza’s character meets Scarlett Johansson’s makes it all the worthwhile for me.  I’m as surprised as you are to see this flick on my Top 10 list, but hey…it is what it is and there’s nothing but a good time to be had here.  While my Blu-ray review of the film won’t post until sometime next week, why don’t you check out Aaron Neuwirth’s theatrical one over here.

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9.  Byzantium

I went into my viewing of Byzantium wanting to like it so much because of my love for the can do no wrong actress, in my opinion, Gemma Arterton (even in Prince of Persia).   However, truth be told, whenever you do something like that you’re almost guaranteed to set yourself up for failure and utter disappointment.   And when that doesn’t happen, then by God that’s when you know you just experienced a blessed miracle.   No, Byzantium is not the second coming of Christ, but who in their right mind would compare such a revolutionary event like that to a film’s quality, unless we’re talking Fight Club, right?  On the flip side, if you go into Byzantium with a bloody, thirsty seeking of re-experiencing another satisfying tale akin to that of Interview With The Vampire with societal emphasis on themes of brotherhood, okay motherhood, and what it’s really like mentally and socially to live for over two centuries and not be able to tell anyone your story, then I can’t imagine you could ever walk away from this one disappointed.  That’s my story and I’m “staking” to it.  And to anyone that’s not familiar with this mostly VOD tittle, I make reference to 1994′s Interview With The Vampire above not because Byzantium is a tale similar to that, although it is, but it’s brought to you by the same visionary director that perfected the vampire formula in cinema, Mr. Neil Jordan.  And for those keeping score…Byzantium is actually Mr. Jordan’s third flirtation with that of the undead in cinema.  If you like his past work, why not sample this one?  I did, and I’m “forever” addicted.  While we did not get a Blu-ray of this film to review, make sure you check out our theatrical one over here.

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8.  Pacific Rim

While I admittedly have never been much of a Guillermo del Toro disciple much to the chagrin of my reviewer counterparts, the man definitely has my attention now.  Growing up in a world of Godzilla films and other monsters in the 70’s, Pacific Rim instantly transported me back to my childhood and like any carefree kid would, I had an absolute blast with this one!  I saw it first in D-Box.  Then I spent the extra bones to see it in IMAX (actually my greatest friend in the whole wide world, Marty, treated us in San Diego).  And finally, when it was released on Blu-ray by Warner Bros., it rocked my world once again!  Talk about a reference quality disc.  Pacific Rim may not be my number one film of the year and I’ll probably lose a lot of street creeds in the industry for even having this one in my Top 10 list, but I don’t care if Jimmy cracks corn because it’s the flick’s constant oversize fun factor and heck…even Idris Elba that keeps me in the game here.  That giddy fun factor is present no matter how many times you pop this bad boy in.  And while it didn’t dominate the domestic box office, it looks like a sequel is in the works and this 39-year old man child is anxiously awaiting its arrival with a big hell yeah.  Congratulations and many thanks to Warner Bros. for believing and standing behind the project and especially to the Rancor keeper Guillermo del Toro for creating monsters to fight monsters in this monstrous film that packs more wallop in every Kaiju scream and Jaeger punch than all five John McClane action adventures combined.  This one by far is the most fun I had at the cinema this year.  And loud…oh yeah!  The Kool Aid man is definitely going to come running full force and knocking down your walls in your house when you rock this one!  If you haven’t already, make sure you check out our Blu-ray review of the film here and definitely make plans to bring this one home.

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7.  Spring Breakers

I’ll be the first to admit that this one tickled me hot pink and neon green all over the place and managed to surprise the hell out of me at the same time too.  I was not expecting the onscreen visceral assault to the senses that this one provided me upon my very first viewing on AppleTV.  I was taken aback by the finest performance of James Franco (this seems to have been his year) that I have ever seen along with the attractive, stylish look and overly-exaggerated tone of this surreal Floridian gangster, drama film.  I don’t really get the people who label this one also as a comedy flick.  Spring Breakers, in my opinion, is definitely in a league of its own when measuring d1cks in the world of flicks that try to emulate the legendary gangster pictures such as Scarface or even The Godfather.  While you’d be a fool to think it was anywhere in the former or latter’s league, you have to at least admit, Tony Montana would definitely be in love with the bedroom and homely decorations (most notably the guns and even the continuous playback of Scarface on a spare television monitor) that adorns the house of James Franco’s character, Alien.  And I don’t know why it wouldn’t be, but if nothing I muttered is up your proverbial alley so far, then you always have Vanessa Hudgens, Selena Gomez, Ashley Benson and Rachel Korine, who pretty much prance around and adorn string bikinis throughout the feature’s entire runtime, and one of the most memorable serenades since Ed Helms belted out the “Doug song” on the piano in The Hangover, as James Franco made me an instant fan of the Brittany Spears’ song “Everytime,” despite my contempt for the woman.  The montage of events that unfolded during his piano rendition was masterfully crafted and playful.  With contributions from Skrillex and even Ellie Goulding, the rest of the soundtrack isn’t too shabby either.  And keep in mind, all this and more throws down in St. Petersburg, Florida.  Who even knew this about this place and all the criminal activity going on there?!  I have been down to St. Pete a handful of times and never knew conditions were this bad with all the gangs and whatnot.  And you said Florida was full of old, unhip people.  Definitely not true!  To learn all about this micro budgeted film of sex, drugs, criminal activity and more check out Aaron Neuwirth’s theatrical review of it over here.

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6.  Gravity

Gravity is simply one of those gorgeous, breathtaking films where you just got to let go and loose yourself in the enormous, immersive environment.  Worry not as you are in the more than capable hands of Alfonso Cuaron and this is one journey you will never forget as he’ll have you squirming in your seat and reacting to every onscreen interstellar blow that happens to George Clooney and Sandra Bullock.  Make no mistake.  This is not a comfortable film.  Sure it’s breathtaking in scope, but you’ll be biting your nails the whole 90-minute runtime rooting on the survival of Bullock and Clooney’s astronaut characters.  While the film is less complex as far as Cuaron’s earlier efforts such as my favorite Children of Men, there’s no denying the epic size of this disaster film and I for one can’t believe that it’s possible for any viewer not to become immersed and absorbed into this vast atmosphere and horrific conditions Alfonso throws you in and also skyrocketing at you.  Like I said, more than once I twitched when Bullock’s character went bouncing off endless pieces of satellite debris, not to mention her constant cloning just to grab ahold of something to stop her perpetual spinning.  There are films that undoubtedly put you int he drivers seat during car chases and whatnot, but if you ever wanted to feel what it’s like to be helplessly floating about in outer space, there’s no better place to achieve this than taking a trip with Gravity.  Remember Tom Hanks so long ago stuck on that island?  Well, this is what it feels like to be stranded in outer space and the desperate clinging to whatever humanity you have left and desire to live no matter what’s waiting for you down on Earth…if you can hold on that long or even make it for that matter.  You have to see the spectacle of Gravity to believe it.  If you still have a chance to see this one theatrically before it hits the Blu-ray format next year, I whole heartedly recommend doing so.  In the meantime you can check out our WSB movie reviews of it here and here.

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5.  The Great Gatsby

While I may not remember everything about the classic F. Scott Fitzgerald novel I read in high school, there’s no doubt in my mind that it wasn’t as beautiful, moving and visually stunning as what Baz Luhrmann put up on the silver screen for all to see, behold and be dazzled in.  Now don’t get me wrong, this movie is NOT for everyone.  In fact, I would go as far as to say that if you don’t like Baz’s Moulin Rouge, don’t even visit here.  Fortunately for me, Moulin Rouge is one of my favorite films of all-time so I have taken in all the majesty and glitter that The Great Gatsby afforded and had to offer me as a participating audience member countless times now.  Even my disdain of actress Carey Mulligan can’t keep me away from multiple repeat viewings of this flick.  Her character’s a b1tch anyway.  Like Moulin Rouge, The Great Gatsby is part love story and part spectacular, spectacular!  And if you got a chance to check this out theatrically in 3-D, then you know what I’m talking about as that presentation was also very “spectacular.”  Makes me wonder how Moulin Rouge may have looked in the format, but I digress.  Fitzgerald’s novel gets energized and rejuvenated here with performances by crowd pleasers such as Leonardo DiCaprio (you know he’s going to always bring his A-game), Tobey Maguire (he’s Spider-Man no more), Joel Edgerton, Jason Clarke and the beautiful Isla Fisher.  Check out our marvelous Blu-ray review of The Great Gatsby over here and if you haven’t already, make plans to bring this slick, polished puppy home already!

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4.  World War Z

After hearing about all the rewrites, the reshoots and the fact that 6 different writers worked on this debacle, I walked in expecting one hell of a train wreck of a movie.  However, much to my fricking surprise, I walked out of the theater after the film’s press screening with a huge a$$ smile on my face, spanning from ear-to-ear.  I hadn’t been that excited about a film in long time.  It felt great as the euphoria of the screening increased the levels of serotonin in my brain and testosterone levels in my you know what.  And that’s always a good thing!  Finally, someone got a zombie movie right.  The action sequences are outstanding and the fast moving plot was tension filled.  To me, World War Z feels like watching the heart pounding 24 hours of Season 5 of the hit Fox TV show 24 in a zombie infested world.  You think that could be the plot of next year’s season of 24?!  Nah…wishful thinking probably.  Brad Pitt’s character, deprived of pretty much all character flaws (note that may not necessarily be a good thing in all cases), is as close as the confident laden Jack Bauer action figure we are ever going to achieve on the big screen.  He just always knows the right thing to do and when you are battling a world wide zombie apocalypse is that necessarily a bad trait to possess?  LOL.  Well, to each their own I guess.  But I enjoyed the hell out of this one, even after multiple viewings.  Four days later after first seeing this one and I was back in the theater for a second helping enjoying it even more after finishing up a quick read of the film’s screenplay and recently diving into the novel of the same name by Max Brooks (thanks Shawn Inman), which coincidentally is really nothing like the narrative of the movie at all (just an FYI).  Sure the third act can be described a s a screeching halt from what came before and can be considered a game changer, but seriously…would you really want this to end any other way?  I’ll leave you with that because there’s always the inevitable sequel that’s already being worked on now.  Hell to the effing yeah!  So why don’t you do yourself a favor and check out my huge Blu-ray review of this zombie apocalypse title, which Sean Ferguson has hailed as my finest penmanship ever, over here and grab your copy while you’re still alive and breathing.  Who knows, some of the lessons learned here may actually save your life one day in the event of an unfortunate zombie virus outbreak.  Who knows?  Stranger things have happened in life, right?

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3.  American Hustle

What would a year’s Top 10 film list be without any mention of the hottest actor in the land, Bradley Cooper?  I’ll tell you.  It would be nothing!  And what happens when you reunite Silver Linings Playbook director David O. Russell and Brad’s co-star from that film, Jennifer Lawrence, in a 70’s retro style con man film?  I’ll tell you.  100% PURE MOVIE MAGIC!  That’s what happens!  And besides the retro feel, look and setting to the story, the filmmakers and whatnot, the first thing that had me at hey now, besides Brad, was his all-star cast lineup of co-stars consisting of the boobs of Amy Adams, the fat belly and combover of Christian Bale (certainly not the Dark Knight anymore), the tall hair of Jeremy Renner and even Louis C.K. as an unlucky FBI manager to Brad’s pivotal character.  Throw in some disco music, some money laundering and some tweed jackets and you have nothing but a good time happening here.  Despite the many different story arcs and point of views going on here, American Hustle manages to keep things together and like The Usual Suspects, ties things up pretty nicely in the end.  Truth be told, the producers of this film already had me at hello with the 70’s setting and the numerous hair curlers that adorn Brad’s awesome hair.  It ain’t nothing but a Brad thing going on here, but I digress.  It’s so much more!  Every one of the main actors really carries their own weight to make this ensemble really tick and flourish down to every last conning joke.  And I have to admit, I struggled with my decision to bump this down to number three against the next entry on my list.  But who can argue when it comes to the legendary tag team of Leonard DiCaprio and Martin Scorsese?  Not I!  But before we move onto what we all can guess number 2 will be, why don’t you spend a few moments familiarizing yourselves with the world of American Hustle by checking out our two theatrical reviews here and here.

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2.  The Wolf of Wall Street

Come on.  Don’t act so surprised!  We all knew The Wolf of Wall Street would rock and blow away the competition, did we not?  It should really come as no surprise to see this film place so high on everyone’s Top 10 list this year.  Like Django Unchained was last year, The Wolf is the Christmas miracle we’ve all been anxiously waiting for this year, at least for me.  And trust me, there’s no getting around this flick’s runtime.  It is what it is.  However, trust me again!  Three hours of your life will never go by so fast as it does with The Wolf as you root on the personal conquest of Jordan Belfort and his hodgepodge cast of hooligans and outcasts as they take Wall Street head-on one drunken, drug laden, debauchery moment at a time and by golly, you will love them all for it!  But you all know where these films all lead to in the end?  Fret not, you won’t leave the theater A) being disappointed or B) feeling all doom and gloom.  Martin and gang doesn’t let you.  And just like how DiCaprio captures the magic of Jay Gatsby brilliantly in The Great Gatsby, as mentioned above, don’t ever let there be any doubt in your mind that he falls short of expectations here either, especially with a mentor such as Matthew McConaughey’s character early on. Oh no! DiCaprio embraces and embodies the role of Jordan Belfort and his chemistry with other cast members, most notably Jonah Hill, and charisma/charm will win you over just like he seemingly manages to do in all his other productions and endeavors.  This man has surely grown bullet proof as of late in modern times.  And while there’s no denying the film whole-heartedly earns its R-rating for profane language, excessive nudity and countless sexual situations, you know…the good stuff, I would love to take a peak behind the curtain and get a glimpse of what we are truly missing out on in the 4-hour NC-17 cut.  One can only hope and pray it makes its way to Blu-ray one fine day, but I have a pretty good hunch that Paramount will come out with their dukes up and hold out for an eventual double dip that I and countless other fans alike will indulge and partake in.  Here’s my glass raised to Martin, Leo and team for offering up another enjoyable romp in the world of greed and corruption, you know…the things that make films like these really good.  So while we drool and wait for a Blu-ray release date, make sure you stop on by and check out our theatrical reviews here and here.

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1.  Oblivion

And now for the most shocking revelation this year.  It’s with much solitude that I understand and realize that this is the point in my list where any credibility I had built up so far is completely tossed out the window of a very tall building, but If it wasn’t for the intervention of fate and the kindness of Aaron Neuwirth, I would have never known what I would have been missing out on here.  You see, I was in the Los Angeles area by fluke on a business trip and I received a text from Aaron asking if I wanted to go to a Universal press-only screening of Oblivion.  While I had no interest in the film, I couldn’t pass up the chance to attend this in Los Angeles and meet all the other critics, like Scott Mendelson, on the local Hollywood scene that I can’t wait to be part of one fine day.  Expecting nothing more than a shallow, pointless sci-fi trip in IMAX I was instantly transported to a world in Oblivion that I genuinely cared about.  It was visually stunning and beautiful despite the depictions of our Earth nearly destroyed and being harvested for all remaining resources.  The cinematography is literally out of this world (no pun intended).  I haven’t been this impressed since last year’s Prometheus.  And then there’s the love story (actually stories) going on with one hell of a clever twist as to how things really don’t appear as they seem to most parties involved.  Many complain that the plot may be a bit too shallow, contain too few action sequences to sustain its inflated runtime and that the film borrows heavily from every other sci-fi adventures that has come before, mainly Moon.  But that’s just it.  Wake up, people! There are no original ideas anymore.  Everything is a retelling or a trial to accomplish something bigger and better.  And the plot devices Oblivion borrows from in sci-fi movies of the past are of all the “right kind” in my opinion.  So I know I’m kind of in the minority here with my love of this Tom Crusie/Morgan Freeman sci-fi action vehicle, but I’m proud to be unique and happy to stand up and defend the title that has meant so much to me this year.  I have taken in Oblivion twice in IMAX and countless spins on the Blu-ray format and each and every time I get goosebumps.  I have a total geek orgasm and an absolute blast with Oblivion each and every time I watch it.  From the kick-a$$ M83 score to the breathtaking visuals, I just lose myself entirely in the world of Oblivion.  And here’s the biggest kicker…I’m not even a huge Tom Cruise fan, but the gorgeous cinematography and rapturous sci-fi story complete with decent acting makes me completely forget all about the fact that he’s in it.  And then there’s that pool scene up in the heavens.  Wow!  The siren Andrea Riseborough is absolutely radiant as she basks in the glow of the Blu-ray blue hues and seductively lures Tom’s fully clothed character (thank God) into the pool with that accompanying M83 score that forces me to change my pants each and every time.  In my opinion it has to be one of the sexiest scenes ever caught on film.  Ingredients such as attraction, chemistry, visuals and the sound are all perfectly mixed in that one special scene.  For this reason and everything I mentioned above, there’s no better film for me this year than Oblivion.  Is Oblivion and I still an effective team?  hell yeah, we are!!!  While my WSB counterparts did not like this film nearly as much as I did, I still encourage you to check out Aaron Neuwirth’s theatrical review over here and purchase a copy of the Blu-ray through Jami Ferguson’s review over here.

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Please feel free to leave your comments of anguish, disgust and even praise below and a big THANK YOU to each and everyone of you for stopping by and making Why So Blu the success it was this year…including our writers: Gregg Senko, Gerard Iribe, Sean Ferguson, Aaron Neuwirth, Jami Ferguson, Brandon Peters, Kori Kemerer and oh why not…Laney Feeser!